OGR 22/01/2015Hey Mailin,I think things have become a bit complex here; for example, father/daughter relationships and a protagonist wanting to explore new worlds... isn't the idea of a world inside a sword-swallower's belly elaborate/complex enough?! I think you need to think much more about establishing this world and its logic as part of your story, as opposed to simply using it as a backdrop for another kind of adventure. Isn't the reveal that we're inside someone's stomach big enough to power your story by itself?I think you need to strip many of these elements out (a hotel!?) and explore the scenario more purely.For example: scene 1: we're in a hushed art gallery; what look like aliens of different types, are gathered around extraordinary artefacts. (What we don't yet is these are not aliens, but bacteria and enzymes etc and that we're inside a human body). This scene is played completely straight. The audience thinks it's watching something science-fiction-y. Aliens in an inter-planetary sculpture gallery. Maybe a small 'child' alien, bored, separates from all the others and goes exploring - and it's through the explorations of this character that the audience (and the 'child' learns) that we're actually inside the body of a human who eats inedible things - this idea is too big to 'not' be the purpose of your story. You need to strip it out, Mailin - and let the scenario breathe a bit or your audience will be confused.